Saturday, June 14, 2008

Septic 101

Pop quiz:  How many chambers are there in a septic system?

I never imagined that I'd ever need to know such things.  Or that I would be able to sustain a whole conversation on the subject while driving across town in busy Saturday morning traffic.  Or that a discussion of sludge and the role of microbes in its breakdown would qualify as suitable conversation over the breakfast table.

But there you have it.  For the last several days we have been fully absorbed with matters of sludge and percolation rates, and have learned more about gravity fed systems versus pressurized systems versus the Cadillac of septic systems, the treatment system, than any city girl should reasonably be expected to know.  But now I can speak muck with the best of them rural folk.

So what does all this mean?  It means that we are soon-to-be proud owners of a defunct septic system.  Yes, today we finished haggling over price adjustments and the septic system is ours. We take possession of it on Wednesday, 02 July.  As a bonus, it comes with a mid-seventies house that will provide us with endless hours of project entertainment.  Although we will have plenty of room for a big screen TV we won't be shopping for one any time soon (big or small) as I expect that we'll be challenged enough at the end of the day to muster enough energy to brush our teeth, let alone prop open our eyes and focus on a TV screen.

I'd list the projects that we've already identified after our initial walk-through of the place, but it's getting close to bedtime and I don't want to give myself nightmares tonight.  Let's just say, we'll be busy. Okay, here's a teaser, since you insist. I'm not entirely sure if the mature grapevine is holding up the green house or if the green house is holding up the grapevine.  They seem to have become one over the years.  But that's just a minor outdoor project that can wait until we take care of some of the more pressing indoor projects - such as installing an oven.  Yes, an oven, that basic of basic appliances. Not only is there no oven, but also there is no place to put an oven without renovating the kitchen. The current owners renovated in 1997 and for some inexplicable reason chose not to include an oven in the complement of appliances that they installed.  Curious, very curious. And then there's - oh, wait.  I wasn't going to get started.  I do need to sleep tonight.

The upside of this place? We'll be within walking distance of the metropolis of Metchosin where one can dine at the only restaurant in Metchosin, the My Chosen Cafe, have coffee at the one coffee shop, buy feed for your chickens, stop at the general store for canned beans, iceberg lettuce, rubber boots, teapots and gardening tools, check on your public services (police, volunteer firehall) and see what's happening at the community hall.

I shouldn't sell the place short.  There are other upsides. The house has the space we need and is structurally sound.  Sure, there are changes to be made to make the place more current and in keeping with our chichi tastes, but basically it's a good house.  The land is beautiful.  The Galloping Goose trail is just at the end of the road.  Everyone in the community with whom we've spoken has been very friendly and welcoming.  And they make great coffee at the coffee shop.  What more could we need?

Nevertheless, it's an understatement to say that this is going to be quite a change from our life here in Kits.  But perhaps not as big a change as this move could have been.  We've managed to get our hands on only one acre of land instead of the five or so that we had hoped to secure, so our farming operation will be significantly smaller than it might have been. Instead we'll take some time to develop some paid employment options to support us while we learn more about soils, micro-climates, crop rotation, green manures and all those other handy terms that I've read but never put into practice. Oh, and monitoring septic systems.  

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